Sandra Cisneros wrote a short story entitled, "Eleven," which begins, "What they don't understand about birthdays and what they never tell you is that when you're eleven, you're also ten, and nine, andeight, and seven, and six, and five, and four, and three, and two, and one."
I'm pondering this idea of being one of those Russian nesting dolls as I listen to the rain drum on the roof and watch my computer clock strike midnight. So I'm 10 and 20 and 30 and 31 and now 32, one age fitting inside of the other. All of those ages have included sleeplessness. But 32 is not feeling my anxiety grow as I count down the minutes I will be able to sleep until I get knocked out by the energy and hormones waiting at my classroom door; it's actually enjoying the quiet of the night, the patter of the rain, and the space to reflect and write.
Getting older doesn't cause me angst, at least not yet. As I watch women in my life add another candle to their birthday cake, it is never a wrinkle or extra pound that I notice, but rather this inner beauty that radiates outward. It inspires me, this grace that they display more vibrantly with each additional year.
Pondering the last year, 31 was pretty kick-ass.
It was facing many rock scrambles to summit volcanoes.
sitting with the myriad of emotions that accompany culture shock
working to adjust my teaching methods to meet the needs of a new group of students
learning how to navigate a new city despite missing the navigation gene
practicing yoga with a panorama of the Andes
It was feeling even more deeply what I already knew: life's greatest beauty lives within my dearest friends and my family, and that beauty is simply staggering.
eating more chocolate than I'd ever before consumed in a year
traveling to pueblitos, beaches, the jungle and more
discovering choclo con queso a la parrilla
looking at my reflection, appreciating more the facets of beauty than the sharp edges of flaws
meeting Mery, my Spanish tutor, whom I liken to Trini, my madre in Spain
It was getting up before dawn to run a 10k at over 14,000 ft with Alli, my adventure-seeking friend.
I'm glad that 32 is about to start building herself around 31...and 30 and 20 and 10.
Another year older, another year more me.
Thank you, Mom and Dad, for making me, baking me and bringing me into the world.
And thank you, Dr. Suess, for your rhymes and wise words.
