Sunday, June 21, 2015

Why Ecuador? This.

It's Father's Day and my fantastic padre spent the afternoon with my mom and sisters at the Twin's Game, noshing on a hot dog with plans to grill out at the Baci Pad for dinner. I was able to chat with Papa Baci for a few minutes during the 7th inning, but my heart was a bit achy to be in the midst of that crowd with him. These trade-offs of living abroad are not easy; they sometimes make my stomach floppy and they sometimes make me feel a bit blue.

My feet are tapping tonight for that flight that takes off in two weeks, the one that doesn't land me on the coast or in the jungle or in a cool new quaint pueblo here, but back in my Midwestern element. I am not feeling particularly articulate tonight as I try to express why it is I have chosen to stay in the Southern Hemisphere for a third year when the truth of my missing life back with my people in the States lingers in the air so strongly this evening.

Twenty-two months ago I boarded the plane with Peter to begin an international experience I was certain would be contained to the two year contract, but now I cannot even say that I know I will move back home after three years. It is a possibility indeed, but not a certainty. Given the sentimental moment I am having right now, my eyes are watery pondering what I am missing by being so many miles away; the triumphs that Giatta and Natalie experience and then the trials that temporarily crush those I love so much.

My life is not better here in Ecuador; I just know it is where I am supposed to be right now. The way that my senses are so heightened, the way that the sights and sounds and smells still seem exotic, the way that I feel myself evolving and expanding, it all entreats me to continue this experience a bit longer. An exceptional truth is that I've never felt more confident, never felt more strong, perhaps never felt so proud of the challenges I have taken on, and, in a sense, never felt so beautiful before taking the big leap to be here.

This past weekend a number of us gringos bussed to Mindo (that whimsical place I am obsessed with due largely in part to the chocolate factory that is nestled upon a hill--where I dined three times in 12 hours on this last trip) for the annual despedida. A number of friends are leaving in a couple of short weeks. Pondering their departure it struck me how unprepared I am to elope from Ecuador at this time. So, it is a good thing, a fortunate thing, that I am able to stay, maybe just one more year.

There is something majestic here, in the whole experience for me really, and also in the landscape. I still cannot quite grasp the beauty I witnessed when a group of us ladies went to The Secret Garden (near Ecuador's tallest volcano Cotopaxi, spewing sulfur and rumbling a bit recently) for Alli's bachelorette celebration last weekend. Our mouths stood slightly agape as we sipped Mimosas and took in this view before returning to Quito:

photo credit: Maria Gribensk
It is well and right that this apartment off of Eloy Alfaro is my home away from home for now. Oh, but how excited I am to give giddy hugs to you all when I return so soon. 

Tonight, abrazos fuertes across continental lines...and in a fortnight, the real deal.

Todo mi amor,

Jame


No comments:

Post a Comment